#And im not even gonna be able to get a full time job after!!!!! EVER! I FUCKING CANT! So ill have studied TEN YEARS
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I am absolutely losing it. LOSING it
#I have TWO. TWO!!!! things in my life that give me a sense of purpose and belonging and happiness#And one of them (studying biology) is fucking ruining my health and the other (going to mrtal concerts) i can barely ever do bc of the 1st#Like here i fucking am trying desperately to get my health back on track#Fucking failing#Bc my digestive system is still a mess and no one is fucking helping me#And i just wanna go to ONE day of a metal festival AND EVERYTHING IS GOING WRONG!!!!!!!!#I HAVE NO PLACE TO SLEEP. I HAVE TICKETS TO SUNDAY EVEN THO I WANT SATURDAY#I HAVE NO IDEA WHETHER IM GONNA HAVE TO SLEEP ALONE BC IT DEPENDS ON WHAT DAY IM GOING#I i i IM TOO FUCKING AUTISTIC TO NOT HAVE THIS SHIT PLANNED OUT MONTHS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!#And im angry at my mom bc she said she was gonna fix the sleeping place#And she OF COURSE didnt and im angry at myself bc i shouldve fucking known#And no i cant even fucking blame her bc her memory is not something she has control over#Which makes me even MORE FUCKING ANGRY#Im just fucking angry that it's gonna take me at least twice as long to graduate#And im not even gonna be able to get a full time job after!!!!! EVER! I FUCKING CANT! So ill have studied TEN YEARS#Only to be LUCKY if i get a half time jov#Job*#And in the meantime i feel fucking sick all the time and i cant go to concerts and do shit outside of studying
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Quick lore question, did marie considering the idea of replacing 4 play into the insecurities she has later?
Absolutely.
I wanna preface this by saying one thing: Young 4 was a COMPLETELY different person before she got recruited by Marie. And Marie...responds to her accordingly.
Long read abt Hero2 events below!! Its. A lil messy sorry qisjke these are my notes
Young 4? A bitch.
Everything she ever wanted was given to her. Moved out of the highlands with an ego the size of a planet (and also bc she felt suffocated there), thinking she can make it in the big city.
...she struggled to make it alone. She had moved out bc her family was suffocating her with love, but now theyre not here, so now she feels homesick and underappreciated.
All that is expressed by her harsh, bitchy attitude. Shes gonna be mean bc no one has seen her for who she is. She'll show them!!
She finds her way around like this, and discovers that shes just as good at turf war here and at home. In fact, shes *so* good that she got the status of a rising star!
It aaalll just gets into her head. Shes "proven everyone wrong" now. Shes got the superiority complex and can back it up.
Marie...
...saw this. She was looking for a new agent to help find the missing zapfish. The second 4 heard this from her, she flexed her arms and...
"Look no further, your hero is RIGHT HERE!"
Marie at first adored the spunkiness of this new agent. Uuuntil 4 started thinking that shes better than her.
"Watch out, Agent Four!"
"You watch YOURSELF, grandma! Think Im a damn idiot to not see that coming? WAHA!"
Marie rolled up her sleeves after several stages full of her ignoring orders or sassing her out of nowhere.
Is that how shes gonna be? Fine.
When 4 finally trips and falls, hard, on a particularly difficult level, Marie pulls her to the side to fix her up and give her a lecture that tore her fucking ego to shreds.
She says something so fucking harsh like "That attitude will make SURE that you die sad and alone. I wonder how anyone puts up with you."
4s too hurt by her own failure to say anything back.
The reality of war finally gives her a reality check. Each victory is earned. its her life on the line. And the world.
She regains her spunk after saving the world.
------
Silly 4. She gets the job done but it takes a LOT of pushing in the mid-stages. Its like she got legitimately bored after the initial super easy ones, and thought the entire campaign a joke.
She went back to her turfing life topside between stages. And she takes a WHILE to come back to her missions -- usually late!! And then before she even goes in she just HAS to yak Marie's face off with what she was doing up there.
"Youre late."
"You shouldve SEEN ME, Marie!! I was carrying that Rainmaker round! I was-"
"Pray tell, Agent Four. How will you keep participating in turf with the Zapfish gone?"
"Whaat? Cmon. Nothing seems to be changing! Theres still power through the city!"
"The backup supply wont last forever, you know."
"Yeah yeah. Okay. Im here now. Wheres the next kettle?"
This attitude is from her high school days, clearly. She breezes by everything so fast that she can afford to do things last minute. It affects even this.
That, alongside her talking smack back to Marie, is what makes her snap at 4. Its what makes 4 stick to the mission fully starting late area 4 and area 5. (This is also around the time 4s life was threatened. God help me in those stupid platforming stages)
Post Hero2, 4 more or less does what 3 does. Shes the "replacement" til 3 comes back. (That cant be good for her confidence.)
At the same time, she has to deal with Callie and Marie talking out what the fuck Callie did with Octaria. "THEY SQUIDNAPPED GRAMPS!!!" and all. Why help them??? They get into squabbles where 4 was the unfortunate witness to. And peacemaker. It does NOT help that Callie for a while kept putting the glasses back on!!!
4 wishes so bad she had help of any sort. She feels 3 might be able to do something but what does she know?? Shes never met em!! She just imagines what the missing agent would do in that situation.
Callie...was also the person she got close to. Shes fun (unlike the stuck up Marie), shes empathic, she opened 4s eyes to the Octarian plight. It made her acceptance of 8 later much smoother.
Im not saying shes not close to Marie either, I bet they healed their relationship around this year too. Marie's sorry she tore 4s ego the way she did (even if deserved...). Marie's much more supportive of what 4s doing topside. Shes expressing her pride in the agent she found much more openly. (She brags abt her to Callie at times.)
The three of them heal together in that time. 4 sees them as older sisters Im p sure. Theyre both giving her tips for turfing and -- Marie even helps her with homework, HAH
And...while I say that 4 and Marie are in better terms, there are still days where Marie blows up on her. Lesser extent than before, but shes *worried* for her agent! (Its a similar plight 3 has.) In those times, its Callie who has her back. ("Hey! Its not like shes not trying!!" Callie understands how it is, and she also knows Marie best -- shes the one who makes 4 understand where Marie is coming from.)
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Hi love! Can I request a social media au with our lovely Chili with his gf who loves cooking and spicy food? Thank you so much and love your account xo
You're in the Kitchen Humming🍝
Carlos Sainz x Chef!Reader
smau♡
summary: yn loves cooking as much as she loves Carlos, a snippet of their relationship full of food because a way to man's heart is through his stomach😉
warning/s: none
author's note: sorry for taking this long to take your request >< Life just got me busy. Anyway, I hope you like this and have a good day! Lovelots♡
yourusername
liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and 109,234 others.
yourusername another day, another recipe.
view 6,789 comments...
carlossainz55 can't wait to be home.
yourusername hurry up then :P user1 HELP THIS IS SO CUTE user2 IM SO SINGLE user3 brb while i lay down the road and wait for a car to run me down
landonorris you better save up some for me
carlossainz55 are you sure, last time you ate some you look like you're gonna explode because of the spice
landonorris tbf it was very spicy but still good
yourusername awww thank you lan!
charlesleclerc can I have some too?
carlossainz55 not you too
user4 yn is so wifey material😭 i want her
liked by carlossainz55 and 145 others
carlossainz55
liked by yourusername, charlesleclerc, and 456,342 others
carlossainz55 date night with my mi amor❤️
view 23,876 others...
user1 who cooked? 🤔
yourusername he did! he's getting tired of the chilis i put into every dinner😭
carlossainz55 i love your cooking but you know I can't take much spice y'know
yourusername very ironic for your nickname🤣
user2 will you marry me instead yn? I love spicy food i would eat it all day and all night😄
carlossainz55 no
user3 a love like this? 😭
user4 they're so domestic it physically hurt my heart
user5 don't ever break up pls😭
yourusername
liked by carlossainz55, lilymhe, and 678,920 others
yourusername rest day so mr. chili right here took matter with his own hands🥰
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carlossainz55 i love cooking for you, means I get free back hugs
yourusername i love your cooking as well maybe we can switch jobs? I drive, you cook?
carlossainz55 deal 🤝 you're not a bad driver yourself😉
yourusername i've got the best teacher😜
user1 this love is so pure🥺
user2 im so😭
user3 ME N WHO?!
user4 might as well go cliff diving without a harness
landonorris so when will i get an invite to one of your dinners ?
carlossainz55 when you're no longer annoying
landonorris you're so mean
yourusername you're welcome anytime lando!
landonorris this is why i consider yn my friend more than you, carlos
carlossainz55 blah blah blah
user5 they're like kids😭😭😭
user6 now i wanna taste yn's cooking too😭
user7 this is what i think of when I listen to sweet nothing by taylor swift
user8 true
user9 taylor told me she wrote it about them
carlossainz55
liked by yourusername, charlesleclerc, and 1,284,029 others
carlossainz55 cooking show off, guess who won?
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charlesleclerc i love u mate but yn definitely won
carlossainz55 i will remember this betrayal
yourusername for that, i will send u some pasta
charlesleclerc 🤩🤩🤩
carlossainz55 so this is how it goes huh
yourusername sorry love, but even your parents said my cooking was better 😜
carlossainz55 okay, masterchef winner
yourusername ig you can get an extra serving of the pesto pasta?
carlossainz55 i will forget everything that has happened in this comment section😄
user1 IM SORRY WHAT? MASTERCHEF WINNER?????
user2 yep!!!😭
user3 OKAY I GET THE HYPE NOW WHY HER COOKING IS LITERALLY SOUGHT OUT AFTER BY THESE VROOM VROOM MEN
user4 the fact that carlos was able to bag her,,, imagine your normal dinner tastes like it's always from a three star michelin restaurant
carlossainz55 can confirm, i would even give it a 5 star if that's a thing💁
liked by yourusername and 2,395 others
user4 NOT CARLOS REPLYING #)"($($('!$
user5 when do i get my own yn????😭 I can't keep eating mac n cheese
carlossainz55
liked by charlesleclerc, landonorris, and 1,482,093 others
carlossainz55 happy birthday, my love. I will love your cooking until I could no longer taste anything. I love you, yn❤️
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user1 HAPPY YN DAY!
user2 HAPPY BIRTHDAY OUR QUEEN
user3 will there be a dinner? Are we invited?
landonorris guess I'll taste yn's cooking💁
yourusername sorry to break your heart lan, carlos didn't let me cook ;(
carlossainz55 well it's your birthday???
landonorris 💔 I should've went when it was his birthday
carlossainz55 the dishes were all for me
yourusername maybe a gathering will do? 😄
landonorris count me in!
charlesleclerc me too!
pierregasly me three
alex_albon me (and lily) four!
georgerussell63 me five!
user4 not yn unintentionally inviting the whole paddock
redbullracing maybe we'll get you as the chef for the catering?
yourusername name your price 🤣
redbullracing anything for the food!
ferrari not so fast
carlossainz55 this is like the worst betrayal ever
user5 redbull will lay down everything for their catering
yourusername thank you, mi amor! I love you too even if you kinda hate spicy food...
carlossainz55 y'know what happens when i eat a lot of it :(
yourusername im just kidding you big baby !
user6 so happy for mother😭😭😭😭
lilymhe happy birthday yn!
yourusername thank you love!❣️
user7 oh to be loved by yn 😭
liked by carlossainz55 and 54,786 others
#f1 smau#smau#f1#fluff#f1 fic#f1 fluff#f1 socmed au#carlos sainz social media au#carlos sainz fluff#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz#carlos sainz x oc#f1 fanfic
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We all care, Spence - Spencer Reid
Summary: The BAU forgot his birthday (how the fuck is that canon by the way?) and you make it better because of course you do
Pairing: Spencer Reid x GN!Reader
Spencer cared, of course he cared, he wouldn't be able to do his job if he didn't care. But there was a voice inside his head that made him wish he didn't care, well more that wished he didn't care that no one cared for him.
He came into the BAU, dreading no one would make a big deal out of today. He knew Penelope would probably do something for the big day, he just hoped it didn't mean big bashes and banners.
But nothing. Zilch. Absolute radio silence.
No one wished him a happy birthday, there was no cheeky remark from Derek about how he's 'getting old' and 'he's gonna be needing help pissing soon', no tight squeeze from Penelope, no well wish from Emily, not even a smile from JJ and Rossi.
Hotch didn't even leave his office that day.
It got to him, a lot, obviously it would get to anyone but he felt like pure shit until you rang.
You had been away for a meeting, working at the BAU means you practically spend every day with Spencer but obviously the one day you couldn't make it was the day of his birthday.
He picked up the phone instantly, "Hey,you," Your voice instantly making him happier by the second. "Happy Birthday, lover"
"Thank you," He chuckled lightly, "I missed you this morning"
Guilt-ridden, you respond with "I know im sorry, i miss you more, I'm hoping the team is making up for the lack of celebration I'm doing!"
Spencers heart rate quickened, "Yeah they are, I'm waiting till we get a case so hopefully I'm not the point of focus anymore"
Spencer carried on lying until you both hang up. He felt even worse after the call, the first time in his life Spencer felt worse speaking after to you.
You were in the car when Penelope rang, asking about your ETA, when you mentioned a thank you for the cupcakes.
"What cupcakes?" She questioned you, genuine confusion in her tone.
"The ones for Spencer?"
"I didn't give Spencer cupcakes? Did he want cupcakes, I'll get him some if he wants them! It's no problem"
"No- No it's fine don't worry, I just got mixed up"
"Oh," Disappointment both filled you and Penelope.
Spence lied to you, but they had all forgotten his birthday.
You had entered the BAU with a bag full of presents, eyes on you as you entered the building. Heading straight for Spencer's desk placing the bag in front of him, kissing his forehead ever so lightly, "Happy Birthday"
His eyes filled with tears, "Thank you, I'm sorry I knew you'd be disappointed if I told you the truth"
"Woah loverboy, getting lucky tonight?" Derek smirked from the opposite desk.
"You only turn thirty once?" You shrug.
Emily immediately lifted her head off the evergrowing pile of files she was working on, "We missed your birthday? Why didn't you tell us?"
"I didn't think it was that important"
"CAKE! I BROUGHT CAKE!" Penelope comes screaming in from her office. "Spencer Reid you rubbed out your birthday off my calendar?"
JJ, and Hotch both came out of the commotion, Rossi came out at the sound of cake, "You guys, you don't have to do this" Spencer stated, sitting upright as he saw the big 30-candle lit dripping onto the icing.
Your eyes glistened"Yes we did, we all care, Spence, we will always care"
#spencer reid#spencer reid angst#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid criminal minds#spencer reid blurb#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fluff#criminal minds#criminal minds drabble#aaron hotchner#derek morgan#emily prentiss#jennifer jareau#penelope garcia#david rossi#moonsreid
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top 11 hardest bad abilities to discover (not listed in order)
(might contain some spoilers)
Dazai (No Longer Human). To begin with, my man had to find someone with a ability. (Probably like, 1/1,000,000 people) And then touch them, if Dazai was a normal guy, and not the demon prodigy, he 100% wouldn't have known he had this ability
Yosano (Thou Shalt Not Die). How'd she even discover this? There's very few scenarios where someone would be half dead, and I doubt that any normal person would be able to discover that they had a ability like this. There's still a chance, but it's very small.
Fitzgerald (The Great Fitzgerald). Imagine, you're a middle class man, normal life, normal income, nothing crazy about your life. How the hell do you find out you become stronger when you spend money. We've seen Fitzgerald not activate his ability when he causally spends, how the hell did you activate it then???
Muishitaro (The Perfect Crime). I- How does a normal person, commit enough crimes to find out that, no they're not getting away with these crimes because they're lucky, they're actually using a ability that erases their crime.
Ace (Madness of the Jewel Kings). Could just be a me thing but, I don't think I've ever met someone with debt slaves. Much less anyone who can convert their debt slaves lifespan into jewels. You either gotta be insane, or have plot armor to find out about this ability
Mark Twain (Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer). You have to be fucking enlisted to find out you have this ability, because there's no way a normal person's gonna have a sniper with them (unless you're in the United States.... Wait-)
Fukuzawa (All Men are Created Equal). This is the same logic as Dazai, there's probably not that many ability users, as you'd have to collect enough ability users to realize "oh, my subordinates get full control over their abilities", also what qualifies as the agencies entrance exam? Is it even necessary?
Pushkin (A Feast in Time of Plague). How the hell do you manage to "coincidentally" find out that you have an ability that affects 2 people with a virus, and that if one of those 2 people don't die, both the people will die from having their organs eaten. You have to be insane or a serial killer to find that ability.
Yukito (Another). I'm genuinely curious on how many mysteries this guy had to solve to be able to find out that the killer in the mysteries always, 100%, without fail, dies after the mysterys been solved. That is extremely and annoyingly specific.
Kajii (Lemon). The whole ass reason I made this post, who the fuck is "conveniently" creating lemon shaped bombs, there's no way he found out this ability through normal means. Was one of his friends a terrorist with a lemon kink? Because that's the only reasonable explanation that he's finding out this ability. Either that or, he's got a big food kink and makes bombs shaped as food during his spare time. There's no fucking way, a normal guy with an office job is finding out they have an ability like that. Atsushi's the main character? Nah, this man has way more plot armor. Because the stars, universe, solar system, and plantes had to align for him to find out about his ability
Ranpo (✨Ultra Deduction✨) please help im being threatened . I mean, he could always be a genius or whatever but... Sure.
#bsd ranpo#bsd yosano#bsd dazai#Bsd lemon guy#bsd fukuzawa#bsd kajii#Bsd ace#Bsd yukito#Bsd#bungou stray dogs#bungou stray dogs dazai#dazai osamu#yosano akiko#bungou stray dogs yosano#fukuzawa yukichi#president fukuzawa#bungo stray dogs fukuzawa#guild bsd#fitzgerald bsd#mark twain#bsd mark twain#abilities#There's no way people are finding out about these abilities#what do you mean? I'm not being threatened by ranpo
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this thanksgiving, looking back at everything that happened this year, i wanna talk about what im thankful for
(under the cut bc you know i yap)
im thankful for the people in my life
there were a lot of moments where i felt alone and that i really didn't believe all those people i had grown close to were genuinely close and not just people easy to let me go as easy as it felt to become friends. i learned throughout the months who those genuine, kind and understanding people were in my life and how grateful i was to really see who they were and start to appreciate them more than i did before.
they were people who believed me and believed IN me the kind of person i was and could be. they were people who told me that they saw a person full of growth and change through these months and that i'm someone they're so glad they still have in their lives. i feel the absolute same moreso than i could put into words
im thankful for the people who aren't in my life anymore
in one way or another to those people who aren't in my life anymore, whether they left themselves or not, im so thankful to them. being part of my life meant that they brought something to my life that forever impacts me and changed who i was as a person for the better. i'll always feel that small tinge of pain in my heart for them no longer being here but i can see and appreciate those moments we spent together.
im thankful for what i had experienced this year
i got to do so many things i never thought id ever be able to. i got to visit a place by myself, terrifying and to see people i had never met before offline, and was able to make it through it and learn that i have that power to travel. i got to get myself properly situated with a job after all these years and am finally working towards saving and gaining more experience with others. i've been able to interact with people offline more than i have in over a decade. everything that had happened, while awful, vile and unnecessary, ultimately led to growth i wouldn't have experienced otherwise in such a short and dramatic amount of time. it pushed me to do things i was too scared to do because i didn't want to be left behind.
im especially thankful for the people here right now and the people who, even months later, still are willing to listen to me. it means so much to see another person look and listen to me to see where im at and being proud of the work done so far. the people who care and see the better in me that even i couldn't see. they keep me going and keep me strong
im so thankful to be alive. there were moments where it felt like that wasn't gonna be the reality but here i am. working, strengthen relationships on and offline, focusing on my health and continuing to be a better version of who i was the day before. im excited to come back to streaming in january and will continue to hold all of this close to me going forward, always
🧡🧡🧡
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Bitching about financials and job things under the cut
My company announced like 2 months ago that our jobs are being eliminated, but it's like this nebulous thing because they're outsourcing and we need to transfer all our products, so my end date isn't until 3/31/2026. Like that's so far in the future and I'm gonna get severence (at end date, i will have worked there for 20 years literally over half my life) + a retention bonus, so I'll be ok for a little while after the fact i think i hope
But anyway i decided to immediately start cost-cutting 2 months ago:
•canceled subscriptions (canceled hulu, paramount+ (i have a plex server hookup anyway), canceled ubereats (and also stopped ordering from them altogether), canceled or went down a level on my minimal patreon subs)
•signed up for Shell's rewards system (it's literally free and you save at least 20cents/gallon every single time and sometimes more without having to spend any money you just click a button and boom extra 10cents if you fill up on a specific day.)
•haven't done *any* fun online shopping or regular store shopping for that matter
•severely cut down my fast food spending (i'm sorry taco bell ily), and as my friends are in similar financial woes, we've stopped ordering food every weekend and opted to make cheap dinners where we each bring some small component like 1 brings pasta 1 brings sauce 1 brings garlic bread
•this isn't a recent change, but i never go out anywhere for like drinks or to see local comedy shows like i used to frequently do. I'm a homebody who goes into the office twice a week and goes to my best friend's house on saturdays and just sits at home the rest of the time
Even with all that!! My debit card is at $26, my 1 credit card is $3 away from its limit, the other is $21 from its limit. I *thankfully* get my paycheck at midnight, but like... woof!
Last paycheck i was down to less than $100 the day before as well. It's so mind-boggling to me that it's this bad. Partially because I've had some unfortunately-timed plumbing issues and had to pay a pricey deductible (but glad i have the insurance obv cuz of how much the total cost would've been otherwise.) But also partially cuz i feel like shit is so much more fucking expensive than it's ever been!! And the last gallon of milk i bought and properly refrigerated went sour like a full week before its expiration date.
I have a decent job and make pretty good money (for now at least.) I have made several cost-cutting measures recently. I feel like I don't *do* anything. And it literally doesn't matter!!
My best friend who has an equally comfortable job told me he had about the same amount of $ as me to last him til his next paycheck too.
And on top of the financial stress, i am so fucking stressed at work because no one knows what they're doing and i keep getting roped into things at the last minute with an IM that says "hey got time for a quick call?" And then i end up having to put together a complicated spreadsheet that is needed by end of week. Why didn't you fucking ask sooner than 2pm on a thursday?! Oh cuz someone who will still have a job at the end of this didn't do what they were supposed to? Ok sure I'll get right on that. And I do. I do get right on that and have it back to you within a couple hours. Because i stupidly care about my job.
Ugghhh i hate everything atm... Except i was able to livestream my favorite singer Terri Clark's debut concert at The Ryman tonight. And i have a ton of Fran/CC fanfics queued up to read. And the Ghosts discord is constantly coming up with the cutest scenarios for H$, my current otp. And i am off the entire next week because next Friday is my birthday. And my dog is snoring.
So i guess it hasn't been such a bad day after all, Charlie Brown... or some such sentimental nonsense 🙃🙃🙃
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work rant so i don’t go insane
alright so for context im a software dev at a company that offers a web application to online store owners that helps automate some stuff among other features. nothing essential just sort of helpful. our founder sold almost all his shares to some fucking investment group that now keeps buying more companies that thematically work with ours to turn this into some big thing they can make even more money with. so i think u kinda get the idea why i fundamentally do not care about this company or the work we do or find it worthwhile. if this company disappeared tomorrow it wouldn’t matter in the slightest. ppl would be mildly inconvenienced for a short adjustment period and then it’d be as if the application never existed. also worth noting that there’s no office, we all work from home, it’s mostly flexible hours and a 30hr work week at full pay so u can also understand why I didn’t just quit at the first sign of unsatisfaction.
another thing for context is that i have a diagnosed anxiety disorder, autism that is only diagnosed unofficially by my psychiatrist/therapist, some sort of problem focusing (not sure if it’s adhd or connected to other health things who knows with this body) and just one physical health issue after another. which means my energy levels are usually at like 50% at most.
now my lack of motivation to spend what little energy i have all on work instead of my actual life, how often i spontaneously get sick and my procrastination due to trouble focusing sometimes leads to me not finishing things on time or handing in half-assed results.
it’s been like this for over a year now but until today no one said anything. and the call today was mostly triggered by two projects i handed over to my supervisor in a half-assed state bc I didn’t get them done well in time before my vacation. but instead of telling me personally and outright he set up this call with him and our team lead. my team lead kept saying how i don’t have any „drive“ (ur right I don’t!) and how it’s on me to communicate faster if im gonna miss a deadline and need help and to find the motivation to „hand in the best possible work I can“ and to stay on top of all technology news that concern our team and make sure my knowledge is up to par.
now the thing is. they’re not really wrong in what they’re saying it’s just that there’s nothing that will ever make me care about this work or motivate me to do it. i will never want to use what little energy i have on work instead of my personal life. i will never be able to comfortably communicate with anyone there. i don’t care how often they say i can say whatever i want to without getting in trouble, i will always still worry about getting in trouble or others thinking im stupid and lazy. i will never care about any of these technology topics or be excited to do this ultimately meaningless job.
but i don’t know how to explain my health issues to them if barely any of it is properly diagnosed. so i don’t know how to make them understand that i can’t give it 100%. this call today was already hell bc I could barely speak full sentences for fear of breaking into sobs and then not being able to stop. i always start crying when i have to talk about my health bc it’s a scary and sensitive topic for me.
i want to quit more than anything. but i have this fundamental issue with all software dev jobs. it is so ultimately meaningless. im not giving back anything worthwhile to other people. if anything it fuels climate change. i would love to get back into biology but lab jobs do not exist here. at all. i don’t have it in me to get another degree. i don’t think my body can handle an exhausting 40hr shift job and doing part time would mean i make so little money that i won’t be able to move out and i really can’t live with my parents much longer without losing my mind. so now im just. stuck. and i feel like if i quit without anything new lined up i will end up in a hole I’ll never get out of. i don’t know what to do.
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The treatment of Lucy’s character really disappoints me.
Every Arc, Lucy is always forced into the role of beaten down, damsel or never given the spotlight to really shine. The only time we ever see her at full potential is tartaros arc and alvarez arc (in the main series i havent read 100yq so im not gonna be talking about it here). However even in tartaros there was bs moves made against her to stop her from fighting.
Like up against jackal, how she chased after him to battle him yet we never got Lucy vs Jackal. Why? Because mashima pulled this bs move of restricting lucy yet again. Holding her back by causing Jackal to hold two people hostage. We NEVER see Natsu put in the same situations as her, its ALWAYS Lucy.
Or with the pheonix priestess movie where I not ONCE saw Lucy fight. She’s always running away, she can’t even catch the gees guy because he magically slips into this random crack in an alleyway because pLoT. I just wanna see her be able to win, like that whole movie I don’t remember a single time she was actually given a moment to just ACTUALLY contribute to the action.
Same with the grand magic games, where she was about to perform urano metria and win (as she should) yet mashima did the same thing of pulling a bs cheapshot with some lamo canceling her spell out of nowhere. It just makes no sense. And we NEVER see this happen to any other characters. We don’t see Natsu’s flames get abolished trying to fight sting and rogue, we don’t see Gray’s ice suddenly melting when he tries to fight, we don’t see wendy having her wind suddenly not work.
It’s ALWAYS Lucy. The shows official punching bag. Fanservice? Just throw Lucy in front of the camera. Characters need a reason to fight? Just have Lucy get beaten up. Need a villian to have a motive? Just have Lucy get kidnapped or her keys stolen. Like literally when do any of the other characters get inconvenienced? I can only think of one time the other characters get the Lucy treatment of being kidnapped and it’s tartaros arc (my fave arc as a lucy stan) but pretty much it’s always only Lucy getting inconvenienced.
AND SIDE NOTE Aquarius just randomly deciding to dip during the tournament MID FIGHT (the water tournament in GMG). I know this is in character for her, BUT LIKE this was just mashima’s excuse to be able to torture Lucy yet again. I mean come on, I get it’s for comedy and all but I’m tired of Lucy being the butt of the joke. Why can’t we just have a moment for her to actually be able to win. And I’m pretty sure Aquarius actually tries to do her job so why would she just dip during the middle of it? I don’t know it just irks me how mashima always finds a way to disarm Lucy (even having villians take her keys too.)
Even in the FIRST EPISODE her keys get tossed aside for plot reasoons! So natsu can come and save the day11!2? It would’ve been so cool if Lucy could’ve fought alongside him and he recognised her as someone with potential to join fairytail. Rather than just having her stand idly by. And in mt hakobe how natsu just magically kicks taurus away whilst Lucy was trying to fight, because we cant have lucy being a character whos actually taken seriously now can we? Nope! She just always has to be the butt of the joke. And in Galuna, where that pink haired girl magically had lucys spirits work against her for just so we can have the obligatory lucy torture yet again. In the lullaby arc what does lucy even do i dont even remember? It’s happy whos the one who suggests for her to use virgo, might as well just give happy the keys at this point. Maybe mashima would actually let them be used for once if happy had them
It’s the same garbage every arc, and it sucks because I love Lucy her magic has such potential to be a powerhouse. We’ve seen her really flourish but the only time she ever gets the chance to flourish is when Mashima realises he’s written himself into a corner and actually HAS to use Lucy’s character. The only times are when he realises no one else can come save her so he actually has to try to use her magic narratively. Like in tartaros (my fave lucy moment) where she FINALLY gets to have her own moment to shine. And against brandish because Natsu is dying of dragon seed cancer!?1?2 oh noes! Looks like Lucy actually has to fight! (W fight by the way one of my fave lucy moments, I was so giddy when I saw her fighting like that for the first time.)
But yeah, I guess I’m just salty that Lucy is constantly thrown aside in favor of Natsu or Erza or sometimes Gray. Lucy deserved better. Sorry for this rant being all over the place, it just saddens me to see Lucy being treated like a joke the entire series. We were robbed.
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so heres the gist of it
im unemployed
that should be the end of it lmao. unfortunately its not
on top of that, i live in one of the cheapest single bedroom apartments in the entire city. and yet according to new rulings that started this spring, im paying 12 euros too much for rent to be considered for the full amount of financial help that i should be able to get to help pay for it, which delays my paperwork every single time i apply for this benefit (thats high key crucial for my survival as, again, im unemployed as fuck) and they keep insisting i need to look for a cheaper apartment (which is impossible, there literally isnt any in this whole city and if there is, they are so sought after at this point people nab them immediately so...) or i might lose most of those benefits in the future. so thats fun
but i cant move cause i cant afford a more expensive place cause 1. im still unemployed as fuck and 2. they wouldnt approve of my paperwork cause even higher rent would be against their rules and the cost limit they are enforcing so...
ive been trying to get a job for a well over a year and a half now. nobody is hiring even tho a lot of people are looking. it always comes down to either being in a location i cant get to (cause its too far and i dont have a car or the hours are so inconsistent i cant make it without a car, usually) or just not being good enough with my skillset or whatever the fuck. it always goes to someone else and its been like that for months now so.. yeah, im kinda stuck with that too
HOWEVER the city has decided to add another fucking wrench into my entire situation since remember, im 1. unemployed as fuck, 2. i dont own a car, or even have a license for that matter, to move around everywhere, and 3. the government is actively trying to get me to move into a cheaper apartment that simply does not exist in this city ffs or they might cut my benefits or at least delay all my payments with taking ages with the added paperwork cause of that :)
so now? they have completely destroyed the bus schedules to my part of the city. nothing moves in or out of here past half six on the evening on weekdays anymore. even worse, on weekends nothing goes past two in the afternoon. which is.. ridiculous. that means that if you work evening shifts, tough shit youre not getting home unless you bike or walk (which isnt exactly a valid option with winter coming soon and lasting for like 75% of the year lmao), youre not getting to morning shifts if they start at 7am cause nothing moves from here before that, god speed if you work on the weekends cause youre really not moving from here or to here almost at all since the schedules were already horrendous and now theyve cut at least three or four drives from that sssssooooooooo
basically what this means is that it cuts my possibilities for jobs i can apply and accept a RIDICULOUS amount. any normal retail job would ask you to be able to work both morning, day and evening shifts; i literally cant do two of those anymore which ofc limits my chances dramatically as someone they would consider hiring. work on weekends? yeah i was already on the fence for it since my saturdays are usually hangout days but i was willing to make sacrifices but knowing i wouldnt be able to work past half two? yeah again, limits my chances so much on being hired
which means. im already struggling to get a job. now with this new schedule they are limiting me so much more on what i can go for and what i can be hired for so i can actually cover any shifts on anything ever. which in turn means im not gonna have that money i need to pay for a bigger apartment. which means im not gonna be able to move. which means im stuck with these schedules. which means im limited in what jobs i can apply and get even considered to be hired for. which means....
you see the issue? you know why im fucking upset and mad and angry and sad and i actually had a screaming crying fit last night cause i cant fucking handle this shit and how inconsidered this whole fucking thing is to literally everyone?? the people who changed the bus scheduling said its cause of the lack of customers (which isnt even true and they compared summer numbers to winter numbers which fucking LMAO ofc people use the busses less during the summer when they can bike or scoot about so much easier. and most of them are not even in town anyways for their vacations so) but also its important to note that i live in the part of town where theres a lot of families and old people and the lack of cars and kids moving around here from school to back is actually very big and yet. YET
im just.. sorry. i needed to get this out. cause its utterly ridiculous and im now stuck in this fucking cycle and i dont know what to do. im gonna send an application for any potential open apartments to the firm i rent from right now since they cover the entire city and have basically the cheapest places here so that maybe i can get something offered to me if anything frees within the next year or so. apart from that i have no idea what to do. i have no desire or money to get a license, let alone a whole ass fucking car, i get anxiety just thinking about driving. im just stuck here, in this goddamn loop that just somehow got worse as i discovered this whole bus scheduling issue last night. and i really dont know how to break it with how these things are all affecting each other
i left the city some feedback about this and got my friends to do it too since we are all fucking mad about this but.. unless they get a noticeable amount of it, i doubt they'll be doing anything about it, or at least not very fast so. im just stuck and im fucked and im upset and im angry and i needed to get this out im sorry if you read this whole thing im just. im going to fucking explode
#if only getting remote jobs would be easy. or i had the skill sets for them#idk sorry i had to get this out im so frustrated and angry about this whole thing#my life is difficult enough with how fucked up im in the head i dont need more external shit from others to ruin it even more#im so fucking tired and dont know what to do#it doesnt help that im just gonna be sad and upset this entire upcoming week for all in and related stuff so. ugh#i might just take the whole week off and rot in my bed instead. idk. im so fucking tired#night is an absolute mess on main
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yoooo
getting ready to be a lot less active on here this year. never gonna just up and leave b/c this is the only place i ever had any kind of following and i love it here. but im not delusional and i realize the support i had a few years ago is waning and the interaction isn’t where i would like it to be. the most engagement comes from reblogging or posting anime and that’s my shit but that’s not all i like or care about. feels like i gotta be a robot and post the same thing everyday to get acknowledgment and im not that. bruh i used to be able to say the most random shit in a text post and get a few notes. and it wasn’t about the notes honestly it was more about talking w/ followers and mutuals and feeling like i had somewhere to express myself. idek if my mutuals even care about me at this point lol and that’s fine. 2016-2018 will always be the peak for me here. most of the ppl i would talk to were super active and there was always something going on. it was my escape from all the bs in the world. nowadays you’re seeing the same shit here as the outside and it doesn’t feel like there’s much personality left on the site imo.
with me finally getting ready to pursue music by the end of this month, this feels like the right time to let go a lil bit. and im also starting to see better opportunities on other social media to help promote the songs that i release. like my soul eater speed coloring post that just flopped on here 🤣 would actually be a good tool for engagement on tiktok. they’re fun to make and i could add my own music in the background. there are full blown instagram pages that just steal people’s edits and get a ton of followers and some money off it. and i know i could do a better job than those clowns. using my own edits for one. but also b/c i really put a lotta work and love into curating whatever i work on. imma still be around for the next few months but somewhere after that imma start to fade out. thank you to everyone on here that ever gave me the time of day, it meant and still means a lot 🖤
#and i do wanna clarify i still get good engagement on other posts#but i miss the connection i had with ppl on here#mutuals and followers#that shit is damn near gone now#but it’s still love to everyone tho 🫰
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gonna post my woes bc i cant take it anymore :)
i seriously dont know what to do i went from working full-time to working one day a week.
it started around when my boss moved houses (his whole business is run out of his house) the move was abrupt and at first i didnt think much of it. i understand the stress involved with moving but he started repeatedly talking down to me. he also wouldn't give me a chance to talk about whatever miscommunication problem that was going on.
im currently making efforts to be more on top of things at work. but theres only so much you can do when all the dogs are relaxing and all the humans are just... sitting around.
since im usually alone with my boss i try to make small talk, but he either ignores me or.... nope thats it actually :) he usually doesn't respond when im trying to talk to him, he gives he a rude one word answer, or he shrugs at me.
one time i came into work and he blamed me for "chores not being done" around the place so i asked which ones specifically have i been "slacking on"... he says im on my phone all the time and that i dont sweep or clean out the waste bins.
phone: id argue that i only use it when theres down time (and theres a LOT of down time) but okay i'll work on that if you want me to, fine. but the other two? a couple hours go by after we feed the dogs i say
"well, this is the perfect opportunity for me to do chores. what needs to be done around here?"
"i just need to you sweep and take out the waste"
"and when do you need those done by?"
"by the time you leave"
by the time i leave... in 4 hours :I so i ask
"... is there anything else that needs to be done? right now?"
and the answer was no of course! i was allowed to sit in awkward silence while my boss got to flee inside. the dogs were able to feel the tension because all of them laid around quietly.
my boss and manager both ignored me when i came into work today. i tried asking about the small changes i noticed coming in like extra water storage and a missing couch cusion, but my boss immediately got annoyed with me. all i could say was "sorry i was just asking..."
im so disappointment, i just dont know what went wrong! we all used to be friendly with each other, i hate getting close to people. i always drift apart from people i enjoy being around because eventually they'll get sick of me. just like every job ive ever had. and????? i understand that you dont need to be friends with everyone you work with. i used to go into work with my head down, and just focus on work. people have a way of out casting me when im not even doing anything.
pity pity pity sad sad sad cringe cringe cringe
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personal rambling in public again
hey how ya doin
just kinda thinkin bout stuff and my year so far
i made a promise to fill this year with just as much events and exciting things as last year and I am making well on that so far, just not really in the way i expected!
i swear i came back from my easter vacation different
i came back from vacation to find out that many of my friends and coworkers were laid off (public news, i wont be getting into detail) and that really bummed me tf out. that was the start of my vibes being thrown off. theres been a kind of aura of sadness in the office ever since, to me at least.
my parents also very suddenly decided to sell the house, the one i grew up in. something thats bittersweet, but generally just another big change that was making me feel weird
then my rebellious phase really began
first, became a true stoner, and got my first tattoo. which quickly became planning my second tattoo (booked next month!)
yes, theres been many jokes about me entering my true form as an artist with the weed and the body art and all
and then, the biggest of all, i decided to say goodbye to my current studio and sign a contract with a new one.
this is the first time im leaving a studio by my own volition and not because i myself was laid off. (its a rough industry lol) its definitely different. a lot more emotional. my current studio is a place ive called home for many years and I really had an amazing time there, and ive made so many best friends and connections there. (its the first studio i worked for! after my brief stints at other studios i managed to end up right back where i started after a company merge lmfao)
i think i was non stop crying for five days straight last week, in utter turmoil deciding if i should stay at my current studio where im highly regarded and my job is as secure as possible (bc of how unstable the industry is right now with the writers strike) and i work with people i adore, or explore whats out there and try something new, but risky.
i ultimately decided to take the risk, expand my brain and see how another studio operates and make new connections and friends. if something happens and im the first to arrive, first to get cut- then so be it. ill make that mistake, then.
once i made the decision i have only felt more and more confident every day in that choice, and excited to start something new. i realize this was probably the exact last change ive been needing. everything else around me was suddenly changing and throwing me off, now i get to be in the driver's seat for a bit. just go all in and really enter a new chapter in my life, as corny as it sounds
anyway next thursday will be a very tearful goodbye again, i think. handing in my resignation i was a MESS. but im also excited! They dont do as many films, but they do a lot of really interesting shows on streaming. and i get to FINALLY call myself a SENIOR ANIMATOR. i already was one, but that studio had their own unique title system, and so it was never really clear to other people in the industry wtf level I am, esp with my very small amount of years of experience. I am officially a Senior Animator. feels nice.
and i also get to have a nice month-long vacation between jobs ^^ gonna take full advantage of relaxation and having free time. gonna even be able to visit my parents this summer, something i didnt think id have time to do. (and see that new house!!) (AND do the convention! and Art Fight! and get my second tattoo! and get back into that slasher-watching and TOTK-playing!)
this was longer than i planned imma go eat wendy's
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Taking accountability over actions.
My parents have always told me life is all about making desitions and hopefully making the right ones.. Now my dad specifically tells me that more importantly life is about making the wrong ones and learning from that. Learning from the pain, the suffering, the shame, the loneliness, the anxiety and so much more. At frist I didn´t understand when he would say that
¿Why would my own father want me experiencing those feelings?
Later on in life I have found the answer, cause he loves me and he wants me to be happy and life a full life, be a complete woman and in order for me to be that I have to have awful days and weeks, hopefully not months and years but you never know. Now I thought I knew what heartache felt like, a breakup, love related feelings but the truth is I have never been in love, never felt true relationship like love, out of my mind Romeo and Juliet love. I know guys have I´ve been with have felt that for me but I have never been able to reciprocate. ¿Why? I have a short (but still important) list of reasons:
Im immature, somehow I still believe in the perfect guy. tall, handsome (not pretty), smart, loyal, funny, pro family, respectful, athelic, good in bed, manly. And I blame my dad for that, he has always shown me that I deserve the world and the best and that everyone is replaceable and when someone doesn´t fit into one of those requirements I should leave. now the problem is that it really shouldn´t be like that. Im not telling you to settle for something lower but I am saying that some things can be fixed and you should focus on the core of the person. most important is that they have to be loyal, tall, pro family, have a job and respectful. the rest can be altered, I can style him better, cut his hair different, send him to the gym, show him tricks in bed. not so important things but the core should be top requirements for a boyfriend.
I only know how to obsess with guys, dont know how to love them.
Im scared of commitment, Im terrified of telling them everything and then im this vulnerable person and they´ll maybe do the same to me.
Im insecure, physically. im always gonna be comparing to other women specially the cute, thin, blonde ones. I always find them more feminine, prettier.
If there are more reasons.. i forgot them.
The point is, due to those reasons im not able to be in a relationship only situationships work until they start getting serious and i dip or do something to fuck everything up. And thats exactly what i did, if i can give you good and simple advice.. DO NOT DATE YOUR FRIENDS FRIENDS.. EVER. yes it can go really well but it also can go REALLY bad. and you dont want to go there, im telling you.
I was going out with my boy bestfriend´s friend, all good, he had more interest in me than i had in him, he asked me out we went out a couple times on dates, i stayed over at his house, all good (kinda, im not gonna get into the werid stuff that pulled me away) but even after i posted him on my story and people saw us out and about, i still got some dms of guys i used to talk to (and fuck) wanting to see me and stuff. This specific guy im kinda obsessing with dmed me and we talked. my situationship saw and yeah. so basically im a cheater, i fucked up and its been like a month and a half and i still cant get over it. i have so much guilt evenm tho my friends forgave me ? and told me i had nothing to worry about i still worry. i feel bad. i saw this great guy that cared for me, crying in his bed, asking me again and again why did i do it and i just didnt have a good honest answer to give him cause honestly i would end up causing more damage.
A month and a half and already fucked another person, I have been on a couple dates but i just cant seem to replace him yet. which is funny cause when we were a thing it seemed pretty easy to replace him. im also lazy cause if i wanted to be with the guy im obsessing with i could just take the metro and be there in a hour. maybe i feel guilty about seeing him too. fuck i feel guilty about seeing my friends too. i have only told three friends, my bestie that i called him the same day it happened and he helped me out a little but hes a guy so he didnt get it as much, my other guy friend and he was sweeter and told me to not worry and that everyone fucks up at a certain time but as long as i knew that it was wrong it was okay and that he had done much worse, and my other friend shes a girl so she understood better and was very sweet about it, i think they´re being sweet with me is because im the youngest and they can see the shame and the regret in my face everytime they see me.
I know that i shouldve been more straightforward and direct and just told him that i could not give him a relationship at the moment but i just didnt wanna lose on any side. i wanted to have him while having another other and not having any kind of limitation or whatever. I understand thats not how life works but sometimes i fool myself into believing that the universe loves me so mcuh that i get this "im gonna look the other way" treatment. i hope i can feel better now and start moving on with my life, i cannot be stuck on this for any longer. i know he is not stuck and i also know that we will see each other eventually and i want him to see me normal, even if i was the one that fucked up i dont want him to see me that affected.
#growing up#relationship#friendship#friends#love#self love#toxic relationship#toxic people#struggle#confusion#abandonment#growing pains#growth#understanding#perseverance#growing#gratitude#experience#wisdom#knowledge#childhood
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Bittersweet Lis: Bonnibelle!!!
NOT FINAL. JUST STUFF I MADE UP WHILE DAYDREAMING. maybe I'll draw her soon idk
Backstory ??? idk if there are plot holes uh
Parents divorced when she was 4 because her mom fell out of love with her dad
They were living in France (I guess she was born there but uh both parents are Filipino though) But after the divorce, She and her dad moved to the PH
She mostly spent time with her Grandparents, aunts and uncles, and cousins
Her mom sometimes visits her from France and she usually just shows up when her dad’s like not around because the tension is weird with both of them in the room
Oh she has a friend in France named Bennet he was like their neighbour and they just communicate online lmao
Her dad is always at work and when he’s at home he avoids her and always sits under a mango tree outside their house just thinking and his eyes just full of sadness (bro is coping)
One time she tripped and her dad was right in front of her and she stood up and stared at him to see if he’d respond but he barely even spared her a glance even after burning a hole through his head. Her grandma just found her standing with the blood from her wound already reached the ground and rushed her inside.
It was like this for a while until she was 12 when her dad decided “bro get yo shit together u have a daughter” then boom he tried to approach her little by little by helping her with her math homework and yeah they’re good now 💥💥💥
When she was 14 she moved to America because her dad got a job opportunity there and boom
Omg bennet in america too?! Meeting my bestie irl (REAL!!!)
Oh wait did I mention she ROLLER SKATES?! Yeah she does she’d brag about it to Bennet all the time
Their relationship is almost kinda like siblings
Dad found a bee eff?!?!!!? Bro has another dad now 🤯 AND a 5 yr old step brother
She also has an art account and it grew following wow!!!
She met her girlfriend during prom when she was 15 wowowow!
She would give her gf those small music boxes every week with a cute note and doodle
They were all silly and happy until her gf’s dad found out about them and they were just walking around then boom her gf’s dad saw them and he punched bonnie right in the face and it was all blurry for her after that
They weren’t able to talk and then one day her gf just moved unannounced and she never saw her again they lasted for 2 years 😢
Bro was heartbroken as HELLL
Oh yeah and soon after all that her brother had a birthday party and did i mention her step-dad’s EX WIFE?! 🤯🤯🤯 yeah she showed and yeah she knows about her and she was like stopping her from coming in but she just got punched in the face AGAIN what a loser lmao
Bittersweet!!
She moved right after college out of impulse (no deep backstory or anything one day she was just like ya what if I move then boom)
Oh ya remember that art account thing yeah she makes money by taking commissions
She got into baking because that was how she would cope with stress now she also has that as a source of income woooo
Met alphonse?! I guess he found her walking around and she was thinking of her gf? She’s moved on but she thinks about her sometimes and yah all that other stuff that happened in the audio
Got interested in alphonse because he is literally PINK and she found the way he talked funny (in like a good way)
Seth appearance real!!! Im not gonna go into too much detail uhh she was just standing there and she was pretty understanding about the whole thing
She wasn’t sure if it was gonna be a good idea to approach seth but she did anyway!!! Bro was shitting herself that morning of the confrontation!!!!
It was kinda awkward with seth at first but she was really nice to him and stuff and yeah real!!!!
All the other stuff that happened in audios wow!!; i dont feel like typing everything anymore uh
Other stuff that aren’t final:
The first friend she ever made in school when she moved to america was casper (yeas, charlie’s lis) casper would talk about charlie all the time. Bonnie thought charlie was fucking DEAD because of the way he talked about him LMAOO (wait hold on this doesnt make sense anymroe I'm gonna change this)
Majored in BA Fine arts and BS Psychology
thought of adding some filipino mythology to her but that might be too extra
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2/2 Hunter showed up now all dressed nicely and showered ‘he looks like he’d knock on my door to talk about the big guy. I like him..little shit’ ‘oh Ted. *starts shaking his head* this hurts a lot. Emmett come on baby, please get rid of him until he gets better. This is not okay. Oh fuck you Ted! WHY IS HE MAD THAT EMMETT IS SUCCESSFUL?! He deserves good things! WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS TO ME? This fucking finale for this fucking show better be good or im gonna be so fucking pissed at them for making me sad all the time’ ‘FUCKING TRUMP BITCH! WHY IS BRIAN HERE?! what the hell is going on? Oh he looks pretty. *looks at me and puts his hands up in defense* dont take this wrong but leather looks good on him. I mean he looks nice in suits but this *waves at brian in stockwells office* Bellissimo!! I like his hair, its all spikey and shit. OH FUCK YOU, you cant do shit for him! *does a little cheers to him with his soda* yeah! No apologies and no regrets. I should live my life like that too *long pause while he goes to get his pills in the kitchen* but i got anxieties bro. HE is offering BRIAN his job back? After he caught him fucking on his own troll posters? Oh he is SCARED!’ The Ted/Em party is on ‘this is killing me. Drugs are evil and so is that fucker! Ted come on! WHY IS HE BEING PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE?! Emy baby, sugar, you deserve better please.’ ‘YES BRIAN! I KNEW YOU WERE SMART! EVEN THO FOR SOME REASON THEY MADE YOU DUMB IN THE BEGINNING OF THE SEASON! *looks at me and pauses tv on Brian again* okay be honest.. could i pull off that type of leather jacket like him? Like that brown one is my new favorite thing. I want it. *points at me while continuing to watch ep* that b-t-w is what oxford dictionary would call a hint. Carl stop being stup- HES DEAD?! THE COP IS DEAD? Suicide? But he made sure to wash his car? What the fuck?’ *once again pauses tv on Em and looks at me with a big smile* ‘i think i have a new idea for a shirt (me: please no, youve done too much already) oh come on! Little mary go fuck yourself sounds hilarious. You’re no fun.’ ‘AW BLONDIE TOOK OU-HIS BOYFRIENDS ADVICE! Thats right Blondie! Gotta take care of your education so that you can be successful and be successful boyfriends with your succes-well currently unemployed boyfriend but oh well. THEY WANT HIM TO WHAT NOW TO WHO? Oh hell no! Absolutely not! Fuck you all.’ ‘Full offense but I wouldn’t allow this doctor mark or whatever to put a fucking bandaid on me. Emmett please im begging you leave him. You deserve way better. Ted *points at him* get fucking help. NO EMMETT NO YOU ARE NOT ANY TYPE OF TRASH FROM ANYWHERE! You dont need him! WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS TO ME?!’ Hunter was told to make a wish for something he wants more than anything ‘wanna bet that his wish was for Brian to fuck him? That’d be mine. Okay Mel is on my good side again.’ ‘ITS JUSTIN AND BRIAN AGAIN! *said with a goofy smile on his face* Brian cares so much about Blondie’s education, it’s actually adorable. I don’t think he cares about anything as much as him doing good in school and being successful. AH-DOR-ABLE! (Justins says sometimes you have to sacrifice everything for what you believe in) *stands up quickly* AND THATS WHY I SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO EAT A PICKLE! Because i believe I am way better than some weird allergy! (I go to say something and he immediately stops me) shhh- hold up, Brian is gonna do something cute. OH DAMN LOOK AT THAT KISS AND HUG! I was right. Put on the next episode, i already miss them’
Put on the next episode, i already miss them is the biggest mood ever
Uhh, remember what I said about hearing him wail all the way in CA? Well “this fucking finale for this fucking show better be good or im gonna be so fucking pissed at them” is making me more worried. Maybe you should have some fanfiction all pulled up and ready to go, just shove it in his face while he’s still crying.
The Ted and Emmett party is so so cringe and awful. Poor Emmy.
He wants Bri Bri’s leather jacket (Gale looks so good in leather) for christmas? From you? Oh lord.
I will take a Team Brian and a Little Mary Go Fuck Yourself t shirt when he sets up his etsy store.
I don’t think Justin’s “sometimes you need to sacrifice everything for what you believe in extends to your brother eating a pickle.
#ask winderlylandchime#dear sweet anon#queer as folk#a straight man watches qaf us 2000 in the year of our lord 2023
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